Why its been While…

I have a few FIRM beliefs in my Life: Treat others how you wish to be treated, Never let the opportunity to tell someone you love them pass, God will never give you more that you can handle, What you are going through may not be fun but it could always worse… these are just a few… Why? you may ask am I noting these today well I have to rewind before I can truly explain. So sorry this is may be a longer posts feel free to Exit at anytime***
Back in January you may have seen that I mentioned I had this crazy eye isse…well it is a condition called Anterior Uveitis or Optic Neuritis. (in real terms Major inflammation that settles in the eye) and well I had dealt with this many times over the last 12 years but this time it was the worst it had ever been. One evening I was working on a project with a few friends and I was asked what was up with my eye after telling the Person (who is also a nurse) they immediately asked me if I had been worked up for MS… I am pretty sure I replied OH YEAH SURE all is well… but in the back of my mind I was like hmmmm why has no one ever asked me that before (meaning my DOCS!!!)
The next day a call to my PCP to get in immediately. When I arrived to her office I told her I do not care what test she ran but it was BEYOND time we figured out WTH was going on with this inflammation. I left with a pile of scripts… Blood work OMG the blood work.. and a brain MRI…. Ugg a Brain MRI… So as the story goes I had all the tests done and on Coles Birthday I got the Call the I had a section of Non Enhancement on the MRI and I need to see a Neurologist. Sorry, What I had WHAT!!! Well trying not to go on line to search was very hard so I looked very minimally. But what I found was what I already knew I had a small lesion on my brain and I needed to see Neurologist. The Neuro’s office got me in with in the week. As I withdrew and internalized most of it…. I did not tell many people outside of my family. But there were my certain friends I told when I was ready. That was quite possibly the longest week of my life. Not knowing what it was how big it was or what was causing it was at times madding. I did what I knew to do I prayed. I am lucky to have friends with HUGE faith you see My one friend he helped me realize…..whatever God had in store I could handle as long as I allowed the good lord run the show… Re finding my faith as a result of all of this is amazing!! I am blessed beyond belief for the people I confided in. I swear god knew who to have me talk with and who not to. Funny how that worked. March 3rd I walked in to that Neurologists office not knowing how life would change but knowing with Clyde and Cole with me I can deal with anything. That day I was able to find out I DO NOT have a brain Tumor! I thank god every day for those words and I mean EVERY DAY!!!! However, the MS question still was not answered and is still being tested for….
The doctor wanted me to See a Rheumatologist and run more tests. Since then I have seen the Rheumatologist and had many more tests run.. Which have lead to a diagnosis of Spodylitis arthritis and getting ready to possibly fight insurance for the Medicine to treat it. But it also had lead to me learning that MS and Spodylitis arthritis can mimic each other on and MRI.. So there is a good chance NO MS but we are still testing to make 100% sure. Also the test have uncovered that I am extremely deficient in Iron, zinc, Vitamin D- B- C (and 300 other things) and my Rheumatic and ANA ( autoimmune) levels are off the charts it has 100% confirmed that I am HLAB-27 positive (this is a DUH and big F-U for all the docs over 12 years that said I was not). I know I sound like a Medical exam but all in all it is all treatable. Between My PCP, Rheumatologist, Neurologist, Nutritionist, Hematologist and the myriad of other docs I have seen it really is not that bad…
I know lots have people who know the story say WHAT!!! How the hell are you balancing this all… Well the reason I choose today to actually post about this is simple… As I was sitting at the Hematologist AKA the Cancer blood center getting hooked up for my 1st Iron Infusion across from me sat a Guy that looked no older than me actually probably younger… I could tell he had a Port in his chest. I knew why he was there but I didn’t…. As my infusion ended his nurse came over to check on him. She asked him how he was doing. He was very soft spoken and replied Not so bad for being her since 8am.. She smiled and said the Doc will be over soon. I looked at the clock it was 4PM… he had been getting infusions ALL DAY!!! And was scheduled to come back in 2 days!!! As the doc arrived I closed my eyes and said a prayer knowing I was the lucky one… The doc and he spoke and the words were like slow motion. This guy asked to be put in a clinical trial… the doc said yes we can look in to that it has great results with colon cancer.. the conversation continued I do not remember much more I tried to sit with my eyes closed one to keep saying my prayers and two to hide the tears… at that time my nurse popped over and unhooked me letting me head home. The drive home was long but I came in & told Clyde and I just said it could be so much worse… Sometimes Life is not fair. Sometimes we have to deal with Crap we would rather not deal with….& I will not lie I have had a few pity parties for myself.. it’s not fun knowing you may have a few big health issues…. But I choose to do my best and look at the positive. No matter the diagnosis that comes over the next few months I know my trust in God and my support system will get me through anything. Today was an eye opener and very humbling and I hope in true #beckahsworld fashion that in sharing this today anyone who is going through something bad or stressful will see even though it seems bad… you are not alone…
For nothing will be impossible with God. ~ Luke 1:37
I can do all things through him who strengthens me. ~ Philippians 4:13
This to is part of the Process …

One thought on “Why its been While…

  1. Rebecca Cueva

    Thanks for sharing, I’m so glad it’s not a brain tumor. Wow you have really went through a lot. I’m glad you have your loving husband for support and you are able to keep things in perspective. I’m curious what kind of vitamins did you take after surgery, and what do you take now? My surgeon told me to always double up on vitamins after surgery, after the clearance period of course. I firmly believe in faith and prayer, its a must for me. Having a relationship with Jehovah God has been my life saving preserver through Jesus Christ. Having a real hope for our future is so necessary especially in the world of uncertainty. I know there are many things we can control but many we cannot. I’m happy you have that support in your life. Thanks for sharing and keeping it real.

Leave a Reply


Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes:

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>